Blue sky. First time in a week. We all jumped up and down and pointed - and I took a picture to commemorate it.
June 29, 2008
June 27, 2008
all the things I've been wanting to say
will mostly have to wait. Here's the short version, sans pictures, because I'm not working from my computer nor do I have the digital camera with me....
We've made it to Beijing!
We arrived in Shanghai on Sunday evening (6/22) and drove straight to Hangzhou, where we spent the next 4 days with Dan's family. All four days consisted of eating, sleeping, and watching TV, interspersed with a walk or two (usually to a restaurant where we'd be plied with huge amounts of incredibly good food).
Dan, as usual, was chomping at the bit to get back to work, but I truly enjoyed just sitting around and staring into space. Thankfully my Chinese comprehension is swiftly returning - and I was even surprised by how much Hangzhou dialect I still understand. Of course once conversations turn to specifics (rather than daily-life generalities), I'm pretty lost, but hopefully that'll change this year.
We took a few Hangzhou pictures, which I'll post as soon as I can. I'll probably just throw some retroactive posts in when I get around to sorting the pictures.
This morning we flew from Hangzhou to Beijing - originally we'd planned to take the train but a two hour flight that was discounted so it was cheaper than the 14 hour train ride was too good to pass up so we were almost immediately in Beijing.
Beijing is huge and the air quality is quite... what we expected ... :-) But our new apartment is great! It's light and spacious and the girls had a great time unpacking their things this afternoon and setting their room up. I hope to spend the next few days just kind of sorting at my own pace and making things homey. I'm not sure what the internet setup at home is quite yet, but hopefully we'll have something soon.
We've made it to Beijing!
We arrived in Shanghai on Sunday evening (6/22) and drove straight to Hangzhou, where we spent the next 4 days with Dan's family. All four days consisted of eating, sleeping, and watching TV, interspersed with a walk or two (usually to a restaurant where we'd be plied with huge amounts of incredibly good food).
Dan, as usual, was chomping at the bit to get back to work, but I truly enjoyed just sitting around and staring into space. Thankfully my Chinese comprehension is swiftly returning - and I was even surprised by how much Hangzhou dialect I still understand. Of course once conversations turn to specifics (rather than daily-life generalities), I'm pretty lost, but hopefully that'll change this year.
We took a few Hangzhou pictures, which I'll post as soon as I can. I'll probably just throw some retroactive posts in when I get around to sorting the pictures.
This morning we flew from Hangzhou to Beijing - originally we'd planned to take the train but a two hour flight that was discounted so it was cheaper than the 14 hour train ride was too good to pass up so we were almost immediately in Beijing.
Beijing is huge and the air quality is quite... what we expected ... :-) But our new apartment is great! It's light and spacious and the girls had a great time unpacking their things this afternoon and setting their room up. I hope to spend the next few days just kind of sorting at my own pace and making things homey. I'm not sure what the internet setup at home is quite yet, but hopefully we'll have something soon.
June 21, 2008
June 16, 2008
what I'm learning from this move....
I have extremely generous friends.
It’s hard for me to ask for help, I’m too used to doing everything on my own, but I’m really tired of having to be "on" all the time, of always being responsible and making all the decisions.
It was a welcome respite to let everyone else decide how to cram everything into the storage unit.
I worry a lot.
I worry that I’ve asked too much of my friends.
We have too much stuff. I dislike waste, but it's become extreme - I’m probably too worried that I might need something and not have it – so I squirrel it all away.
I need to stop being such a boy scout – who cares if I’m not always prepared. It would be liberating to have more breathing room and less stuff.
It’s always a bad idea to go to bed hungry. I wake up in the middle of the night, can’t get back to sleep for all the worrying, plus I’m hungry.
It’s hard for me to ask for help, I’m too used to doing everything on my own, but I’m really tired of having to be "on" all the time, of always being responsible and making all the decisions.
It was a welcome respite to let everyone else decide how to cram everything into the storage unit.
I worry a lot.
I worry that I’ve asked too much of my friends.
We have too much stuff. I dislike waste, but it's become extreme - I’m probably too worried that I might need something and not have it – so I squirrel it all away.
I need to stop being such a boy scout – who cares if I’m not always prepared. It would be liberating to have more breathing room and less stuff.
It’s always a bad idea to go to bed hungry. I wake up in the middle of the night, can’t get back to sleep for all the worrying, plus I’m hungry.
June 10, 2008
America, sweet place
Kids are an occean away from me. I get teary when I see their old and new photos posted by Wendy. I’m glad they’re growing happily. When I look at these pictures from the China side of the Pacific, I see that children in middle-America (not geographically speaking) are in paradise.
Chinese children living in my apartment complex are pretty spoiled. They look smart but do not have the same innocence as American children, at least children from Davis, CA :-). The eyes of many Chinese urban children seems to reveal the collective defilements of the society – parents work too much; social relations are excessively dependent upon economics; the political system is top-heavy leaving little room for private moments. Modern China is not the ancient China that hippies, scholars, and philosophers have idealized in North America. The age of sagely innocence is long gone. I do not meet wise men on the streets of Beijing, playing with children.
Now, before I meet someone new, I prepare myself to be “scanned” by that person who may want to figure out if I’m a person of “value” to his or her interests. Here I’m making a broad generalization. I don’t want to be mean to the country where I had my childhood, but the fact is – I miss California; it’s my home where our children were born and are growing happily.
Chinese children living in my apartment complex are pretty spoiled. They look smart but do not have the same innocence as American children, at least children from Davis, CA :-). The eyes of many Chinese urban children seems to reveal the collective defilements of the society – parents work too much; social relations are excessively dependent upon economics; the political system is top-heavy leaving little room for private moments. Modern China is not the ancient China that hippies, scholars, and philosophers have idealized in North America. The age of sagely innocence is long gone. I do not meet wise men on the streets of Beijing, playing with children.
Now, before I meet someone new, I prepare myself to be “scanned” by that person who may want to figure out if I’m a person of “value” to his or her interests. Here I’m making a broad generalization. I don’t want to be mean to the country where I had my childhood, but the fact is – I miss California; it’s my home where our children were born and are growing happily.
June 09, 2008
Hey, who's that new kid?
Today we went to a sleepover and our friends' mom cut my hair. She's a professional. After my hair was cut a lot of people said that I look like a different person. My imagination of my class when I walk in to the room tomorrow is that they will open their mouths and just stare at me and wonder who I am. How about you?
posted by Merlin
posted by Merlin
June 05, 2008
Dragon's Well Good Luck Shop
Ancient China, Greece, India, Egypt, and Rome filled my head every hour of the day, and why?
Market Day ended with success, as I had gotten many items in trade. At the end of Market Day I lugged my wagon full of stuff (the wagon I used to bring things to Market Day) all the way back to school.
Some time during the school year my teacher, Mr. Cook announced that we would be doing a very important project on one of the five ancient countries we studied about. And, it was only a few days ago that it really happened. It was called Market Day.
Market Day was a day when all of the sixth graders got together and everybody chose a country and a job. People were chandlers, potters, fisherman, and glassblowers from all countries.
I, myself, was a Chinese good luck fortune shop owner. First I brought goldfish and crickets which were the most popular things in Market Day. I also brought good luck knots that I had made, and told fortunes.
The fortunes didn’t really make it through but the knots were second choice. Surprisingly, I was even written about in the Davis Enterprise.
Market Day ended with success, as I had gotten many items in trade. At the end of Market Day I lugged my wagon full of stuff (the wagon I used to bring things to Market Day) all the way back to school.
posted by Devin
June 03, 2008
speak your mind
I've been thinking, lately, about censorship.
Of course, when dealing with China, it's inevitable that the topic of censorship will come up, but state based, externally applied censorship isn't the only face of this creature, though it's highly relevant since I'm going to be publishing this blog from within China. In fact I felt the need to search out alternative plans to ensure that I'd still be able to access much of the internet in spite of the notorious controls in place. Thanks to a very generous friend, I have some options that should solve the problem that even Dan's experiencing lately (he can't access the blog at all right now - at least not reliably, which is the key to the puzzle.).
There are a number of articles, found by the most cursory of internet searches, that talk about how limited the "Great Firewall" of China is. When dealing with the Chinese state, and maybe this is true for any authoritarian leaning society, government placed restrictions metamorphose into internally generated restriction. Apparently, the strength of China's internet control lies not so much in any concrete, unimpregnable, permanent qualities, but more in the variable and unpredictable limitations, on the implied threat of penalty as much as a guarantee of any penalty at all.
In this Atlantic article, the author writes, ""Depending on how you look at it, the Chinese government’s attempt to rein in the Internet is crude and slapdash or ingenious and well crafted. When American technologists write about the control system, they tend to emphasize its limits. When Chinese citizens discuss it—at least with me—they tend to emphasize its strength. All of them are right, which makes the government’s approach to the Internet a nice proxy for its larger attempt to control people’s daily lives."
With such a huge population it wouldn't make logistical sense to have a constant condition under which every single person is under surveillance - though it may be the truth in the sense that electronic communications data, in particular, are simply stored for a later time should the need arise (much like what is done here of late). There's a distinction between surveillance and censorship, but for censorship to be broadly successful there must be some type of surveillance even if it's something as straightforward as requiring government approval of manuscripts submitted to a publisher. Like something out of Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-Four, China's attempts to monitor and control internet content "is supplemented by human censors who are paid about $170 a month. They sit at screens in warehouse-like buildings run by the Public Security Bureau. These foot soldiers in China's information war monitor domestic news sites, erasing and editing politically sensitive stories... Sensitive entries are erased, and in the most egregious cases blogs are shut down altogether." (from Wired)
The city of Shenzhen came up with a way to remind internet users (not just content providers) that they were also being watched. Their cartoon characters, Jingjing and Chacha, were modified for use in Beijing as well (awww, aren't they cute? How could you not think they have your best interests at heart after seeing their pictures?) and they apparently pop up on computer screens every half hour or so. An unnamed official is quoted in China Digital Times, saying, “The main function of Jingjing and Chacha is to intimidate, not to answer questions.”
I haven't done any historical study of the extent of censorship in China during the communist years, but anecdotally, I've found, as the Atlantic article suggests, that "the government's approach to the Internet [is] a nice proxy for its larger attempt to control people's daily lives." This is where the more insidious, hidden version, of censorship shows up - it's the censor made real in one's mind, created in a "culture of fear."
There's a lot of openness in China these days, and I don't mean to harp on the negative, but some years ago I recall bringing up one of those topics that crossed the invisible line in people's minds - and some of the older people with whom I was talking felt the need to close the front door, so the neighbors wouldn't hear, and they excused themselves from the conversation, leaving it to the younger generation to carry on.
A writer I worked with in 2003, stated explicitly that though there were topics he wished he could write about, he knew without doubt that they would never garner approval and thus, he was better off censoring his desire to cover those topics. He knew, without asking, what was acceptable and what wasn't. He said that it was difficult, wanting to write about what he believed in, when he wasn't allowed to believe in anything other than what was permitted. Unspoken, was the assumption that the responsibility of believing, and dictating the right kind of belief, lay with the government.
A writer Dan has been in contact with in the past is under house arrest, I just found out the other day (also via China Digital Times), and another spent time in prison some years back.
This is how that culture of fear is created. This insightful article explores that dynamic within an audience (comprising both Chinese and foreign guests) viewing the filming of a talk show episode and shows how easy it is to give in to self-censorship.
We will be careful, but I'm already fully aware that our information is processed and reviewed (a discreet way to say 'under surveillance') - on both sides. Maybe someday I'll tell you about the FBI visit. Fine, so be it. I actually give that less credit, though, than my own internal censor, the one who pressures me to present only culturally/socially approved messages, who would hogtie my writing so I appear presentable and "nice."
Personally, I'm not really interested in those sensitive topics, in and of themselves. I don't need to cause trouble or prove a point; I just have my regular life. But I'm a writer at heart and I pay a lot of attention to the process, so it caught my attention that my thoughts are coming out a bit stilted on this blog (at least so far, this post may just break the ice for me here) - and that's probably because it's the first time I've written for an audience who knows me. I'd like to overcome this internal censor, to write the truth of my experience in the coming year, so sometimes that means I'll be critical of China and sometimes it means I'll praise it (and sometimes it means I won't write about China at all, but about really random things). Americans often have strong opinions about China and Chinese people and I may have little regard for those assumptions. There's pressure from the US end of things to say certain things about Tibet, for example, but I'm not a mouthpiece for anybody's ideology - and the fact that I feel cornered is an indication that our society also engages in tactics that coerce people to censor their thoughts and conclusions (Dan's certainly found this to be true in academia).
For me in this case it's less a result of overt political "influence" and more that I'm trying to find a balance between my need to really dig into my experience and understanding of China, and to admit and own my opinions even if they're unpopular or incomprehensible, versus the "happy" way of glossing over what's difficult, keeping to the positive, and just showing vacation photos.
So I'll post the requisite number of vacation photos, but I'll also do my best to write honestly and unfettered.
Of course, when dealing with China, it's inevitable that the topic of censorship will come up, but state based, externally applied censorship isn't the only face of this creature, though it's highly relevant since I'm going to be publishing this blog from within China. In fact I felt the need to search out alternative plans to ensure that I'd still be able to access much of the internet in spite of the notorious controls in place. Thanks to a very generous friend, I have some options that should solve the problem that even Dan's experiencing lately (he can't access the blog at all right now - at least not reliably, which is the key to the puzzle.).
There are a number of articles, found by the most cursory of internet searches, that talk about how limited the "Great Firewall" of China is. When dealing with the Chinese state, and maybe this is true for any authoritarian leaning society, government placed restrictions metamorphose into internally generated restriction. Apparently, the strength of China's internet control lies not so much in any concrete, unimpregnable, permanent qualities, but more in the variable and unpredictable limitations, on the implied threat of penalty as much as a guarantee of any penalty at all.
In this Atlantic article, the author writes, ""Depending on how you look at it, the Chinese government’s attempt to rein in the Internet is crude and slapdash or ingenious and well crafted. When American technologists write about the control system, they tend to emphasize its limits. When Chinese citizens discuss it—at least with me—they tend to emphasize its strength. All of them are right, which makes the government’s approach to the Internet a nice proxy for its larger attempt to control people’s daily lives."
With such a huge population it wouldn't make logistical sense to have a constant condition under which every single person is under surveillance - though it may be the truth in the sense that electronic communications data, in particular, are simply stored for a later time should the need arise (much like what is done here of late). There's a distinction between surveillance and censorship, but for censorship to be broadly successful there must be some type of surveillance even if it's something as straightforward as requiring government approval of manuscripts submitted to a publisher. Like something out of Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-Four, China's attempts to monitor and control internet content "is supplemented by human censors who are paid about $170 a month. They sit at screens in warehouse-like buildings run by the Public Security Bureau. These foot soldiers in China's information war monitor domestic news sites, erasing and editing politically sensitive stories... Sensitive entries are erased, and in the most egregious cases blogs are shut down altogether." (from Wired)
The city of Shenzhen came up with a way to remind internet users (not just content providers) that they were also being watched. Their cartoon characters, Jingjing and Chacha, were modified for use in Beijing as well (awww, aren't they cute? How could you not think they have your best interests at heart after seeing their pictures?) and they apparently pop up on computer screens every half hour or so. An unnamed official is quoted in China Digital Times, saying, “The main function of Jingjing and Chacha is to intimidate, not to answer questions.”
I haven't done any historical study of the extent of censorship in China during the communist years, but anecdotally, I've found, as the Atlantic article suggests, that "the government's approach to the Internet [is] a nice proxy for its larger attempt to control people's daily lives." This is where the more insidious, hidden version, of censorship shows up - it's the censor made real in one's mind, created in a "culture of fear."
There's a lot of openness in China these days, and I don't mean to harp on the negative, but some years ago I recall bringing up one of those topics that crossed the invisible line in people's minds - and some of the older people with whom I was talking felt the need to close the front door, so the neighbors wouldn't hear, and they excused themselves from the conversation, leaving it to the younger generation to carry on.
A writer I worked with in 2003, stated explicitly that though there were topics he wished he could write about, he knew without doubt that they would never garner approval and thus, he was better off censoring his desire to cover those topics. He knew, without asking, what was acceptable and what wasn't. He said that it was difficult, wanting to write about what he believed in, when he wasn't allowed to believe in anything other than what was permitted. Unspoken, was the assumption that the responsibility of believing, and dictating the right kind of belief, lay with the government.
A writer Dan has been in contact with in the past is under house arrest, I just found out the other day (also via China Digital Times), and another spent time in prison some years back.
This is how that culture of fear is created. This insightful article explores that dynamic within an audience (comprising both Chinese and foreign guests) viewing the filming of a talk show episode and shows how easy it is to give in to self-censorship.
We will be careful, but I'm already fully aware that our information is processed and reviewed (a discreet way to say 'under surveillance') - on both sides. Maybe someday I'll tell you about the FBI visit. Fine, so be it. I actually give that less credit, though, than my own internal censor, the one who pressures me to present only culturally/socially approved messages, who would hogtie my writing so I appear presentable and "nice."
Personally, I'm not really interested in those sensitive topics, in and of themselves. I don't need to cause trouble or prove a point; I just have my regular life. But I'm a writer at heart and I pay a lot of attention to the process, so it caught my attention that my thoughts are coming out a bit stilted on this blog (at least so far, this post may just break the ice for me here) - and that's probably because it's the first time I've written for an audience who knows me. I'd like to overcome this internal censor, to write the truth of my experience in the coming year, so sometimes that means I'll be critical of China and sometimes it means I'll praise it (and sometimes it means I won't write about China at all, but about really random things). Americans often have strong opinions about China and Chinese people and I may have little regard for those assumptions. There's pressure from the US end of things to say certain things about Tibet, for example, but I'm not a mouthpiece for anybody's ideology - and the fact that I feel cornered is an indication that our society also engages in tactics that coerce people to censor their thoughts and conclusions (Dan's certainly found this to be true in academia).
For me in this case it's less a result of overt political "influence" and more that I'm trying to find a balance between my need to really dig into my experience and understanding of China, and to admit and own my opinions even if they're unpopular or incomprehensible, versus the "happy" way of glossing over what's difficult, keeping to the positive, and just showing vacation photos.
So I'll post the requisite number of vacation photos, but I'll also do my best to write honestly and unfettered.
what mischief can I get into now?
I was looking through old files the other day, reminding myself of what we'd done the last time we lived in China.
On weekends we'd go out to teahouses with my sister-in-law and let the kids run around. I remember these looks on Devin's face and that I started referring to her as a firecracker about that time....
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